Did I mention that we are approved?! Well we are! Now we just wait for a phone call to tell us to come and pick up Baby F. The phone call might come next week, or it could be as long as a year away. I daydream about that phone call a lot.
In the mean time, I am feeling the need to plan, organize, re-organize and scrub every corner of the house. I am finding myself making lists and moving furniture – only to re-arranging it again. Can anyone say nesting? 🙂
Most days I think we will have a boy. How fun would that be! Dinosaurs, airplanes, trucks, sports and pirates…I love it!
But then, oh then, I see this:
and I fall in love with the idea of having a sweet baby girl.
We have also been doing a lot of thinking about what life will be like when the baby gets here. Conversations often drift to, “When the baby is here…”.
Adoption is so fun!
Our friend Shala is at #1 on the waiting list with her agency!! We are so exited for her! We met up early in our adoption process and it has been neat to watch another person get ready to be a mom through adoption.
Next weekend, my friend Jess and I are going to create a baby registry! Yea!
“I often regret that I have spoken; never that I have been silent.” – Pubilius Syrus
I’ve been pretty quiet on the blog this year for a number of reasons – getting ready to add a person to our family, more demands at work, and purposefully taking some time to myself.
The other day this blog hit me square between the eyes:
“”We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature — trees, flowers, grass — grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence. We need silence to be able to touch souls.” – Mother Teresa
“Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence….” -1 Kings 19:11-13
Over the past few months I have been feeling like I need to find time to allow for silence. Reading the statements above just confirmed it for me. So I am working hard to carve out space in my day where I can get away and find silence. Turning off the t.v. and shutting down the computer actually takes quite an effort. As with everything in life, balance is the key. While we can not live in silence at all times, a small portion of the day spent in solitude and quietness is appealing.
What about you? Does silence work for you? What do you hear?
“When I speak of wisdom being hidden, I mean that wisdom is not found on the surface of life. Like all precious things it has to be dug for and searched out….. It is a little like allowing the young chick to make it’s own way out of the egg: muscles are developed necessary for life. ”
-Philip Baker from A Wiseheart, The Forgotten Factor
Wisdom is available if we take the time to look for it. Perhaps it is the act of searching that allows for wisdom to be seen. But then again, a fool would never bother to look for in the first place, so their circle starts all over again.
Just something I have been thinking over lately.
Sometimes it is a struggle between seeing the best in people or the worst of people.
Over the past year, I have heard the most awful of stories: murder (those that did and those that were nearly), rape, child abuse, domestic violence, rejection of parent to child, racism, segregation, hatred, greed, betrayal and the list could go on. At my job, some days are heavy than others. And try as hard as I may, some days I take it home. Not because I want to, but because I would not be human to be moved so deeply by these stories.
The flip side of all of this is that if you look closely, within these awful events lays another story: courage, forgiveness, hope, resilience, determination, and healing. Some days the good stories are so easy to see. Other days you have to hunt for them.
My therapist (because all therapists ethically should see their own therapist. And yes, I can recognize the overwhelming irony it this) told me, “You can not control what other people think, how they act or what decisions they make. The only person you can control is yourself. Your reactions, your behaviors, your feelings. ”
How insightful is that?
So for today I am choosing to see the good and not be discouraged by the overwhelming bad. I am choosing to place my hope in the One who heals and comforts. I am choosing to have hope not as a form of denial of the bad, but rather in spite of it.
What about you? What kind of things are you choosing about yourself?
Never try to crack a joke in a room full of therapists. They will not laugh. They will only analyze you. And then it will be weird.
This year I am reading Bread For The Journey by Henri Nouwen. Just wanted to share what I read yesterday:
‘Consolation is a beautiful word. It means “to be” (con) “with the lonely one” (solus). To offer consolation is one of the most important ways to care. Life is so full of pain, sadness and loneliness that we often wonder what we can do to alleviate the immense suffering we see. We can and must offer consolation. … (cont) To console does not mean to take away the pain but rather to be there and say, “You are not alone, I am here with you. Together we can carry the burden.” That is consolation. We all need to give it as well as to receive it. ‘
There are days at work when I hear awful stories -the worst of the worst of humanity. At times, I can become overwhelmed by other people’s stories and feel the need to ‘fix’ it in attempts to gain some sense of control in what feels like a hopeless situations. I then find myself frustrated with my lack of ability to ‘fix’ things that are not mine to fix. How refreshing to remember that I first need to offer consolation, and later, the rest will work itself out.
I love it when what you are reading matches your situation and offers hope, a renewed energy, and changes your perspective for the day ahead.
Those who know me well know I love all new gadegets. It is my weakness.
I saw this today:
I am saving every penny I have so I can get it when it is released.